I think I’d call this the first real thing I set out to properly draw on my own simply for the sake of it.
The story begins long before this, when I took the opportunity to moderate an art chat that was dealing with infighting, big egos, unfriendly competition, and so on. It wasn’t entirely toxic, but the usual mods were on hiatus and the arrival of some problematic users meant that there was a gap that needed to be filled.
Over time, I got more familiar with the regulars. I’d sometimes give my outside perspective, or discuss my non-drawing projects to find some common ground. I began to see things I had never seen before with drawings: messy sketches, rough drafts, scrapped projects, advice and corrections… A lot of my misconceptions about the whole process kept getting proven wrong one after another, meanwhile I kept an eye on the place, whether lurking or otherwise. I think that chipped away at a lot of the hesitation I had about even getting into the hobby.
Still, it took a lot of persuading from the regulars before I committed myself to start drawing. I was in a good spot, already having a laptop that could serve as a drawing tablet, so I came up with an idea and got to work.
And it took so many hours to get this done…
After showing the result to a handful of people, I was told to keep it up.
It was hard at first, but I was giddy about just the fact that I was actually drawing, and that people were actually taking it well.
In spite of the poor attitude to furries in that community, those same people had also pried out from me the interest I’ve always had in them. They encouraged me specifically to draw things that went past my comfort zone, even if they might not be fans of the stuff.
… Yeah, I had a very serious self-consciousness problem.
That, I think, would prove to be a huge force in pushing me to keep drawing; to figure out a character of my own. To create an identity for myself like those who I’d see online from a distance, wishing I had that ability to express themselves in a way that transcends reality, unique to themselves and their own personalities.
So… yeah, this is the first ever drawing of Noi, I guess?